SALT practices teach us to become clear about why we are feeling the way we do. From here we can figure out what need(s) we have and more calmly communicate, inquire, and make requests. This approach drives connection and lowers the defenses. The digs, nagging, and yelling are strategies to meet a need, and a yearning for connection is actually often at the root of these “behaviors.” However, these “behaviors” often lead to disconnection, the opposite of what we truly want.
We often observe people ignoring one another, shutting down, or increasing the digs, nagging, and yelling because it’s what we were modeled and the underlying need continues to remain unmet and unaddressed for us. If you can relate to this, SALT practices can help. Practice makes progress, and practice coupled with vulnerability and ownership creates shifts.
